Quarantined

Momma is sick. 

I have the flu.

Can I get a womp womp?  Yeah, it sucks.  Not only do I hate not feeling well, but I hate not being a mom.  I know I oftentimes tell you how hard this whole gig is, but I wouldn't change it for the world.  I've spent my days on the couch, popping Advil and Tamiflu like Sour Patch Kids.  Since I'm quarantined, when Daniel calls to say he's on the way home with our ladies, I Lysol everything downstairs and make my way upstairs.  I've been listening to the hustle and bustle of our crazy awesome life downstairs, and I can't help but smile.

What makes me smile the biggest?  The pitter patter of little feet.  They are running from room to room.  Ah, that pitter patter.  I'm trying to stop and soak in that noise.  Their little voices.  They are chatting and laughing and even crying.  I hear their daddy playing with them (and also disciplining them), and he's the best.  Right now they are running around chasing each other.  It's almost bath time, so I have a feeling I'll hear Mickey Mouse come on for them to calm down.  Maybe before that, I'll hear Ed Sheeran's new album for a short dance party.  These sounds - this is our life.  Their little voices, their tiny feet, their attitudes getting them in trouble.  This is it.  I know that I will certainly miss this one day, so I try to be grateful and soak it all up the best I can.

And Daniel.  He keeps our ship afloat.  He called me (yes, on the phone, haha) and told me he was feeding the girls dinner so I could come down and catch up with them, since they were contained in high chairs and he knew we wouldn't touch.  So very thoughtful.  But our life, it's fantastic.  Bumpy, yet the very best journey.  We have multiples and life can be tough.  We are grumpy - and we take it out on each other.  We are tired, worn out, and exhausted.  We just finished up the first season of This Is Us, and I can't help but think about the quote from an episode a while back.  From the momma, Rebecca, to her unborn babies in her belly:

"I've been acting out lately.  I've been terrible to your dad who is just perfect.  He is so perfect, oh my god you guys are going to freak out when you see how awesome your dad is.  Honestly, you're going to be huge fans.  I think I'm nervous about you guys meeting me.  I don't know how much you can tell from in there but I'm not going to be the perfect mom you've been dreaming about.  You guys dream, right?  I think so.  I'm impatient.  And I'm stubborn.  And I'm terrified that I'm going to make 100 wrong decisions and ruin the chance you guys have to leave the perfect lives you deserve, but I will protect you fiercely.  And I will always sing to you when you can't sleep.  And I will always be excited to hear you laugh.  I bet you guys are going to have wildly different laughs, huh?  I love you so much it hurts and I haven't even met you yet; it's crazy.  So I guess what I'm trying to say is you are going to have to take the good with the bad when it comes to me.  So now that you know all of this, are you still excited to come join me out here?"

Girls, I'm trying.  Your daddy and I are doing the very best we can.  We will make lots of mistakes, but don't ever forget how much you're loved.  Fiercely.  I want to take your giggles and pitter patter of your tiny feet and bottle them up and listen to them forever, like the ocean in a seashell.  Stay little, my sweet girls.  Don't ever grow up.  Thank you for making us insanely rich.